Without it, he wouldn’t be able to accept my close relationship with my ex because of the kids and not feel threatened, I wouldn’t have worked on my issues (it was hard for me to go from being a wife for 23 years to a girlfriend) and he wouldn’t realize how important I am to him and that money and status and success are now second to our relationship. We were talking just this weekend about how it took the journey we went on for us to get where we are. As a matter of fact, he’s looking into doing something else so that we can have a better future together. That is when I found this site and realized it was my needy behavior that caused issues (he never said that, just I was adding to his stress.) I worked on myself and he worked on making me a priority and work now comes in second. He said maybe we could try again when things at work settled down. And he told me he couldn’t deal with it and broke up. He owns his own business, his free time is precious and I was adding to his stress wanting to see him, getting irritated when he didn’t answer a text within and hour, etc. The second time we broke up was because I was being needy and insecure. We got in a big fight and it took months before we were back in contact. The first time we dated he thought I was still hung up on my ex husband and he was a rebound. Things are amazing, we’re incredibly in love and talking about marriage and the future. It will be a year next month that we’ve been back together. My own personal experience is that he did come back. Both couples who broke up, got back together, got married and had kids. Just look at Prince William and Kate Middleton and Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel. I can understand why people say that but it’s not my experience.
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